There's a tendency to think that because we work with machines that are tireless and ready for more work that we need to behave in the same way; we need to constantly utilize these resources. We try become like the machine; tireless and always ready for more work.
-### FIXME
+There's a problem with always being "on". When we feel like we always have to be "on" we never let ourselves feel like we can be "off" again. We don't allow ourselves the time to be off. This creates a pattern where we deny ourselves the moments to sit and reflect on what we're doing. We force ourselves to keep moving; keep programming no matter the personal cost. Our brains don't get the ability to rest, relax, and recharge. Our minds are too busy and exhausted to process what we've learned and sweep that knowledge into long-term storage. When we get exhausted we start to worry that we're not doing enough. This doesn't motivate us; instead we create a vicious feedback loop of fear and panic. We spend our day worrying that we're not doing enough while our minds cry out "enough!" from exhaustion. This feedback loop of fear and exhaustion can spiral us into a vortex of burnout, depression, and a desire to leave programming for good.
-There's a problem with always being "on". When we feel like we need to be "on" all the time we don't allow ourselves any time to feel like we can be "off". We create a pattern where we deny ourselves the moments to sit and reflect on what it is we're doing. We force ourselves to keep moving; keep programming no matter the personal cost. We don't allow our brains to relax and recharge. We don't let our minds process what we've learned and sweep that knowledge into long-term storage. Instead we create a vicious feedback loop of fear and panic. We spend our day worrying that we're not doing enough while our minds cry out from exhaustion. This feedback loop of fear and exhaustion can lead to burnout, depression, and a desire to leave programming for good.
+There's a delicate balance that we need to strike between our desires of being on all the time and our needs for relaxation and reflection. Our desires for invincible and indefatigable development need to be tempered with the reality that our bodies and minds have finite resources per day and must be allocated appropriately. Think of this as power-management for a complex machine that the manufacturer (currently) won't let you swap the battery out for a new one. Being aware what processes are running, how much energy is being used, and how much energy is left would be vital to ensuring you could still be running that machine later on in the day. That's the level of awareness that we'll need to have about ourselves.
-So how do we balance these feelings of wanting to be on all the time while allowing ourselves to relax and reflect on what we're doing?
+How do we balance these feelings of wanting to be on all the time while allowing ourselves to relax and reflect on what we're doing? How do we pay attention to the needs of this programming machine?
## Lights out
-First we need to acknowledge that we can't be on all the time. You may know this intuitively and think "yes, of course" but acknowledging that you need to have a period where you are not programming, not thinking about programming, and not being a programmer is vital to your well-being. You need to have moments where you can turn off the programmer part of your being.
+First we need to acknowledge that we can't be on all the time. You may know this intuitively and think "yes, of course" but knowing is not the same as doing. We need to have a periods where we are not programming and not thinking about programming. We need to have moments where we can turn off the programmer part of our being. These periods of not-programming are vital to our well-being and give us chances to explore the wider world and let our minds rest in-between programming sessions.
+
+This can be tricky if we feel like we're falling behind in our learning. When are we supposed to learn all of the new things happening daily? When are we supposed to catch up on all of that technical debt you've been accruing over the years? When will we have time to learn the ins-and-outs of technologies that aren't part of our day-to-day work but are still interesting to us?
-This can be tricky if you constantly feel like you're falling behind in your learning. When are you supposed to learn all of the new things happening daily? When are you supposed to catch up on all of that technical debt you've been accruing over the years? When are you going to have time to learn the ins-and-outs of whatever technology that is no longer part of your day-to-day work but is still interesting to you?
+These feelings that we have (that there's more to do and that we need to spend every waking moment doing it lest we fall behind) isn't helped by programmers who look super productive. These are the programmers that think of a clever idea in the morning and have a working prototype in the afternoon (while still handling normal work routine). When we compare ourselves against these programmers we wonder if they ever take time away from the computer.
-This constant feeling that there's more to do and we need to spend every waking moment doing it or we're somehow less of a developer isn't helped by folks who look super-productive; the folks whom you can suggest something in the morning and they have a working prototype in the afternoon while still figuring out their normal work routine.
+We can acknowledge that we have feelings of wanting to push ourselves to keep learning and doing. We can see ourselves when we think "just one more line of code before bed" or convince ourselves "I can read a few more articles or pages or [insert favorite way to consume more information here]". We can pause and see where these feelings and thoughts come from and understand why we're still pushing ourselves beyond exhaustion.
-We can acknowledge that we have this feeling; that we feel the constant need to somehow push ourselves to keep learning and doing. We can see ourselves in the moment with the thoughts of "just one more line of code before bed" or "I can read a few more articles or blog posts or [insert favorite way to consume more information here]". We need to see our feelings and understand where they come from.
+### FIXME
These feelings usually stem from a sense of inadequacy. We feel like we're not measuring up to whatever ideals we have, whether that's an ideal that is externally driven or one that we made ourselves. This comes from us comparing ourselves to other programmers and seeing their work. It also comes from us comparing ourselves to our own mythical idea of what the perfect programmer is.
projects / themediocreprogrammer.git / blobdiff