+## Dead ends and changing topography
+
+Sometimes we'll find ourselves learning something that's a dead end. We look at our progress and see no real improvement. We don't find the topic as engaging or as exciting as we'd imagined. We realize that what we're learning is an evolutionary dead-end in the realm of programming. What then?
+
+Part of our learning process is understanding that our expectations of how something will turn out can be completely different from how things actually do turn out. We envision all sorts of rewards and platitudes that never come. Does that mean we're at a dead end? I don't think so. What it might be is a case where what we expect we'd be doing with our newfound knowledge isn't panning out. Or we may find that our expectations for how quickly we'd learn the topic aren't being met and we see more and more ahead of us. We may also expect that our career will be bolstered by learning this topic and yet all we hear from the job market is resounding silence.
+
+Our engagement is related to our expectations. Programming demands a certain amount of fun and reward and if we're not finding the experience fun or rewarding then we're unlikely to want to continue being engaged with learning that topic. Our minds begin wanting something else to engage us and we crave anything other than to continue with this learning process. After all, shouldn't we be enjoying this? If there's no engagement and enjoyment then the learning becomes drudgery. We become distracted more easily while trying to learn and our minds drift away rather than focus on our learning experience.
+
+And then there's the problem of learning things that are evolutionary dead ends. The world of computing is littered with the remains of technologies and methodologies that are either no longer relevant or are considered "out-of-fashion". What once was cutting edge is now considered moribund, and the community around that technology / methodology scoot on to new technology / methodologies and leave their previous work as a technological ghost town. When we mention that we're learning these things we get curious looks from developers when we mention what we're learning. "Why would you learn that? We've moved on to this other thing". It's as if we've heard about a party and arrive in time to see the clean-up crew picking up the litter and breaking down the tables and chairs. We feel like we missed out on the good parts and wonder if it's even worth trying to keep up and find the next thing.
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+All of these can pose their own problems for learning but it's up to us to take a more critical look at why we started this whole process of learning. What did we bring into this?
+
+In each of these cases we brought our expectations of how the learning would progress. We brought the expectation that it would always be fun, engaging, and relevant. Sometimes our learning expectations do pan out, but when they don't we get discouraged and disappointed.
+
+Rather than being upset at how our expectations of learning this technology / methodology aren't being met we can take a more mindful approach. We can see ourselves in our moments of learning and notice if we're trying to bring more than our focused attention into the learning container. We can realize that learning is about changing ourselves and change is not always fun, engaging, or pleasant. We can put aside our expectations and concentrate on the learning itself.
+
+That doesn't mean we shouldn't acknowledge our feelings. We should certainly feel the feelings of boredom, anxiety, disillusionment, and so on. But we should also be mindful of where those feelings come from. Are we truly bored or is this our mind trying to tell us to stop so we can do something more fun? Are we not engaged with this material because we don't find it relevant or are we looking to run to our distractions? Is this really a dead-end in our learning or are we just feeling stuck right now? Notice when the feeling comes up and be curious about what prompted the feeling. Note when you get the feeling and where you feel it most in your body. Stay with the feeling for a few seconds and keep noticing it. Then, continue your work. While you work keep noticing all of the feelings you're having and repeat the process of staying and noticing your feelings. When you're done you can reflect more on those feelings and make an honest determination of what those feelings are indicating. Through this process you can clarify what is causing those feelings and if they are just resistance to learning new material or a desire to run to distractions or something more familiar.
+
+If, however, you realize that you're really not enjoying learning this topic; if you feel you're spending more time convincing yourself to learn rather than actually learning, then you'll need to have an honest discussion with yourself about why you're learning this topic at all. Is this topic still relevant to you or has the topic become irrelevant? Are you learning this out of an obligation to yourself or others, and is that obligation still present? Are you trying to learn whatever it is because you're worried you'll be left behind, whether that's personally or professionally? Think about what brought you to start learning this and see if the situation has changed. If someone came up to you and asked you if you would like to use this topic in the next few days would you consider it?
+
+You'll need to reconsider your true motivations for learning this topic and see if they still match what you want to do with your programming profession. But you'll also need to be honest with yourself about why you're learning this topic and why it is important to you. There are plenty of things to learn that are great career paths but if you have no interest in the topic, or are just learning it "to get hired" you're going to have a more difficult time learning the topic than if you had a genuine interest in it. But you'll also need to see if this is just resistance to learning. Your challenge will be to sort out your true feelings about this topic and tease out whether you've genuinely lost interest or are just struggling.