From: David Griffith Date: Mon, 19 Nov 2012 03:08:38 +0000 (-0800) Subject: main body of code converted to using an included nki.inf X-Git-Tag: r7~7 X-Git-Url: https://jxself.org/git/?p=rfk-inform.git;a=commitdiff_plain;h=9ff3a0caeedb804e8fb4c343cba20d6955be7bfd main body of code converted to using an included nki.inf --- diff --git a/kitten.inf b/kitten.inf index 9e029a3..72d5b9c 100644 --- a/kitten.inf +++ b/kitten.inf @@ -1,6 +1,6 @@ ! robotfindskitten ! A Zen Simulation -! Release 7 / Serial number 040523 / Inform v6.21 +! Release 7 / Serial number 121119 / Inform v6.32 ! ! [-] |\_/| http://www.robotfindskitten.org ! (+)=C |o o|__ Leonard Richardson (C) 1997, 2000 @@ -26,15 +26,8 @@ ! ! Developed with Inform 6.21.4 as installed from NetBSD's pkgsrc tree ! and Frotz 2.42. -! -! -! Compile it with: -! inform "-~S" kitten.inf <-- Assuming Unix -! ^ -! | -! Gets rid of debugging code which doesn't really do -! this sort of program any good in the first place. ! +! ! Notes: ! 1) More than half of the code is taken up by non kitten items ! (NKIs). When I compiled the code with just five messages and @@ -50,14 +43,9 @@ !Switches xv5s; -Switches v5d2; +Switches "d2~S"; -! Number of messages -! This must be updated when adding new messages. -! -Constant MESSAGE_NUM 800; - Constant Nonkitten_Default 20; ! Maxmimum possible number of non-kitten items on the playfield at once. @@ -65,16 +53,16 @@ Constant Nonkitten_Default 20; ! Constant Nonkitten_Max 589; - Release 7; -Serial "040523"; ! Presumed release date +Serial "121119"; ! Presumed release date !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Constant Story "robotfindskitten"; - Constant Headline "^A Zen Simulation^"; +! NKIs are generated with nki2inf.pl and put into nki.inf +Include "nki.inf"; Constant Anim_Meet 10; ! Number of spaces from the left where ! Robot and Kitten meet during animation. @@ -148,7 +136,7 @@ Global Real_Release = 0; 'I': print_instructions(); 'A': print_about(); 'T': print_thoughts(); -! 'P': print_all_nki(); ! See print_all_nki() below. + 'P': print_all_nki(); ! See print_all_nki() below. } if (key == 'Q' || key == $1b) ! $1b == ESC break; @@ -217,17 +205,7 @@ Global Real_Release = 0; } print "Release ", Real_Release, " / Serial number "; for (i=18:i<24:i++) print (char) 0->i; - print " / Inform v"; inversion; print " "; -#ifdef STRICT_MODE; - print "S"; -#endif; -#ifdef INFIX; - print "X"; -#ifnot; -#ifdef DEBUG; - print "D"; -#endif; -#endif; + print " / Inform v"; inversion; print ""; new_line; ]; @@ -898,856 +876,11 @@ Global last_right = false; ! the menu, this will cause a script file to be written which contains ! all NKIs properly formatted. -![ print_all_nki num mystring; -! @output_stream 2; @output_stream -1; -! for (num = 1: num <= MESSAGE_NUM: num++) { -! mystring = lookup_msg(num); -! print (string)lookup_msg(num), "^"; -! } -! @output_stream -2; @output_stream 1; -!]; - - -! To use '~' or '@' in NKIs, keep the following in mind: -! @@126 == '~' -! @@64 == '@' - -[ lookup_msg num; - switch(num) { -1: return "~I pity the fool who mistakes me for kitten!~, sez Mr. T."; -2: return "That's just an old tin can."; -3: return "It's an altar to the horse god."; -4: return "A box of dancing mechanical pencils. They dance! They sing!"; -5: return "It's an old Duke Ellington record."; -6: return "A box of fumigation pellets."; -7: return "A digital clock. It's stuck at 2:17 PM."; -8: return "That's just a charred human corpse."; -9: return "I don't know what that is, but it's not kitten."; -10: return "An empty shopping bag. Paper or plastic?"; -11: return "Could it be... a big ugly bowling trophy?"; -12: return "A coat hanger hovers in thin air. Odd."; -13: return "Not kitten, just a packet of Kool-Aid(tm)."; -14: return "A freshly-baked pumpkin pie."; -15: return "A lone, forgotten comma, sits here, sobbing."; -16: return "ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND CARPET FIBERS!!!!!"; -17: return "It's Richard Nixon's nose!"; -18: return "It's Lucy Ricardo. ~Aaaah, Ricky!~, she says."; -19: return "You stumble upon Bill Gates' stand-up act."; -20: return "Just an autographed copy of the Kama Sutra."; -21: return "It's the Will Rogers Highway. Who was Will Rogers, anyway?"; -22: return "It's another robot, more advanced in design than you but strangely immobile."; -23: return "Leonard Richardson is here, asking people to lick him."; -24: return "It's a stupid mask, fashioned after a beagle."; -25: return "Your State Farm Insurance(tm) representative!"; -26: return "It's the local draft board."; -27: return "Seven 1/4~ screws and a piece of plastic."; -28: return "An 80286 machine."; -29: return "One of those stupid ~Homes of the Stars~ maps."; -30: return "A signpost saying ~TO KITTEN~. It points in no particular direction."; -31: return "A hammock stretched between a tree and a volleyball pole."; -32: return "A Texas Instruments of Destruction calculator."; -33: return "It's a dark, amphorous blob of matter."; -34: return "Just a pincushion."; -35: return "It's a mighty zombie talking about some love and prosperity."; -36: return "~Dear robot, you may have already won our 10 MILLION DOLLAR prize...~"; -37: return "It's just an object."; -38: return "A mere collection of pixels."; -39: return "A badly dented high-hat cymbal lies on its side here."; -40: return "A marijuana brownie."; -41: return "A plush Chewbacca."; -42: return "Daily hunger conditioner from Australasia"; -43: return "Just some stuff."; -44: return "Why are you touching this when you should be finding kitten?"; -45: return "A glorious fan of peacock feathers."; -46: return "It's some compromising photos of Babar the Elephant."; -47: return "A copy of the Weekly World News. Watch out for the chambered nautilus!"; -48: return "It's the proverbial wet blanket."; -49: return "A ~Get Out of Jail Free~ card."; -50: return "An incredibly expensive ~Mad About You~ collector plate."; -51: return "Paul Moyer's necktie."; -52: return "A haircut and a real job. Now you know where to get one!"; -53: return "An automated robot-hater. It frowns disapprovingly at you."; -54: return "An automated robot-liker. It smiles at you."; -55: return "It's a black hole. Don't fall in!"; -56: return "Just a big brick wall."; -57: return "You found kitten! No, just kidding."; -58: return "Heart of Darkness brand pistachio nuts."; -59: return "A smoking branding iron shaped like a 24-pin connector."; -60: return "It's a Java applet."; -61: return "An abandoned used-car lot."; -62: return "A shameless plug for Crummy: http://www.crummy.com/"; -63: return "A shameless plug for the UCLA Linux Users Group: http://linux.ucla.edu/"; -64: return "A can of Spam Lite."; -65: return "This is another fine mess you've gotten us into, Stanley."; -66: return "It's scenery for ~Waiting for Godot~."; -67: return "This grain elevator towers high above you."; -68: return "A Mentos wrapper."; -69: return "It's the constellation Pisces."; -70: return "It's a fly on the wall. Hi, fly!"; -71: return "This kind of looks like kitten, but it's not."; -72: return "It's a banana! Oh, joy!"; -73: return "A helicopter has crashed here."; -74: return "Carlos Tarango stands here, doing his best impression of Pat Smear."; -75: return "A patch of mushrooms grows here."; -76: return "A patch of grape jelly grows here."; -77: return "A spindle, and a grindle, and a bucka-wacka-woom!"; -78: return "A geyser sprays water high into the air."; -79: return "A toenail? What good is a toenail?"; -80: return "You've found the fish! Not that it does you much good in this game."; -81: return "A Buttertonsils bar."; -82: return "One of the few remaining discos."; -83: return "Ah, the uniform of a Revolutionary-era minuteman."; -84: return "A punch bowl, filled with punch and lemon slices."; -85: return "It's nothing but a G-thang, baby."; -86: return "IT'S ALIVE! AH HA HA HA HA!"; -87: return "This was no boating accident!"; -88: return "Wait! This isn't the poker chip! You've been tricked! DAMN YOU, MENDEZ!"; -89: return "A livery stable! Get your livery!"; -90: return "It's a perpetual immobility machine."; -91: return "~On this spot in 1962, Henry Winkler was sick.~"; -92: return "There's nothing here; it's just an optical illusion."; -93: return "The World's Biggest Matzoh Ball!"; -94: return "A tribe of cannibals lives here. They eat Malt-O-Meal for breakfast, you know."; -95: return "This appears to be a rather large stack of trashy romance novels."; -96: return "Look out! Exclamation points!"; -97: return "A herd of wild coffee mugs slumber here."; -98: return "It's a limbo bar! How low can you go?"; -99: return "It's the horizon. Now THAT'S weird."; -100: return "A vase full of artificial flowers is stuck to the floor here."; -101: return "A large snake bars your way."; -102: return "A pair of saloon-style doors swing slowly back and forth here."; -103: return "It's an ordinary bust of Beethoven... but why is it painted green?"; -104: return "It's TV's lovable wisecracking Crow! ~Bite me!~, he says."; -105: return "Hey, look, it's war. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. Say it again."; -106: return "It's the amazing self-referential thing that's not kitten."; -107: return "A flamboyant feather boa. Now you can dress up like Carol Channing!"; -108: return "~Sure hope we get some rain soon,~ says Farmer Joe."; -109: return "~How in heck can I wash my neck if it ain't gonna rain no more?~ asks Farmer Al."; -110: return "~Topsoil's all gone, ma,~ weeps Lil' Greg."; -111: return "This is a large brown bear. Oddly enough, it's currently peeing in the woods."; -112: return "A team of arctic explorers is camped here."; -113: return "This object here appears to be Louis Farrakhan's bow tie."; -114: return "This is the world-famous Chain of Jockstraps."; -115: return "A trash compactor, compacting away."; -116: return "This toaster strudel is riddled with bullet holes!"; -117: return "It's a hologram of a crashed helicopter."; -118: return "This is a television. On screen you see a robot strangely similar to yourself."; -119: return "This balogna has a first name, it's R-A-N-C-I-D."; -120: return "A salmon hatchery? Look again. It's merely a single salmon."; -121: return "It's a rim shot. Ba-da-boom!"; -122: return "It's creepy and it's kooky, mysterious and spooky. It's also somewhat ooky."; -123: return "This is an anagram."; -124: return "This object is like an analogy."; -125: return "It's a symbol. You see in it a model for all symbols everywhere."; -126: return "The object pushes back at you."; -127: return "A traffic signal. It appears to have been recently vandalized."; -128: return "~There is no kitten!~ cackles the old crone. You are shocked by her blasphemy."; -129: return "This is a Lagrange point. Don't come too close now."; -130: return "The dirty old tramp bemoans the loss of his harmonica."; -131: return "Look, it's Fanny the Irishman!"; -132: return "What in blazes is this?"; -133: return "It's the instruction manual for a previous version of this game."; -134: return "A brain cell. Oddly enough, it seems to be functioning."; -135: return "Tea and/or crumpets."; -136: return "This jukebox has nothing but Cliff Richards albums in it."; -137: return "It's a Quaker Oatmeal tube, converted into a drum."; -138: return "This is a remote control. Being a robot, you keep a wide berth."; -139: return "It's a roll of industrial-strength copper wire."; -140: return "Oh boy! Grub! Er, grubs."; -141: return "A puddle of mud, where the mudskippers play."; -142: return "Plenty of nothing."; -143: return "Look at that, it's the Crudmobile."; -144: return "Just Walter Mattheau and Jack Lemmon."; -145: return "Two crepes, two crepes in a box."; -146: return "An autographed copy of ~Primary Colors~, by Anonymous."; -147: return "Another rabbit? That's three today!"; -148: return "It's a segmentation fault. Core dumped, by the way."; -149: return "A historical marker showing the actual location of /dev/null."; -150: return "Thar's Mobius Dick, the convoluted whale. Arrr!"; -151: return "It's a charcoal briquette, smoking away."; -151: return "A pizza, melting in the sun."; -152: return "It's a ~HOME ALONE 2: Lost in New York~ novelty cup."; -153: return "A stack of 7 inch floppies wobbles precariously."; -153: return "It's nothing but a corrupted floppy. Coaster anyone?"; -154: return "A section of glowing phosphor cells sings a song of radiation to you."; -155: return "This TRS-80 III is eerily silent."; -156: return "A toilet bowl occupies this space."; -157: return "This peg-leg is stuck in a knothole!"; -158: return "It's a solitary vacuum tube."; -159: return "This corroded robot is clutching a mitten."; -160: return "~Hi, I'm Anson Williams, TV's 'Potsy'.~"; -161: return "This subwoofer was blown out in 1974."; -162: return "Three half-pennies and a wooden nickel."; -163: return "It's the missing chapter to ~A Clockwork Orange~."; -164: return "It's a burrito stand flyer. ~Taqueria El Ranchito~."; -165: return "This smiling family is happy because they eat LARD."; -166: return "Roger Avery, persona un famoso de los Estados Unidos."; -167: return "Ne'er but a potted plant."; -168: return "A parrot, kipping on its back."; -169: return "A forgotten telephone switchboard."; -170: return "A forgotten telephone switchboard operator."; -171: return "It's an automated robot-disdainer. It pretends you're not there."; -172: return "It's a portable hole. A sign reads: ~Closed for the winter~."; -173: return "Just a moldy loaf of bread."; -174: return "A little glass tub of Carmex. ($.89) Too bad you have no lips."; -175: return "A Swiss-Army knife. All of its appendages are out. (toothpick lost)"; -176: return "It's a zen simulation, trapped within an ASCII character."; -177: return "It's a copy of ~The Rubaiyat of Spike Schudy~."; -178: return "It's ~War and Peace~ (unabridged, very small print)."; -179: return "A willing, ripe tomato bemoans your inability to digest fruit."; -180: return "A robot comedian. You feel amused."; -181: return "It's KITT, the talking car."; -182: return "Here's Pete Peterson. His batteries seem to have long gone dead."; -183: return "~Blup, blup, blup~, says the mud pot."; -184: return "More grist for the mill."; -185: return "Grind 'em up, spit 'em out, they're twigs."; -186: return "The boom box cranks out an old Ethel Merman tune."; -187: return "It's ~Finding kitten~, published by O'Reilly and Associates."; -188: return "Pumpkin pie spice."; -189: return "It's the Bass-Matic '76! Mmm, that's good bass!"; -190: return "~Lend us a fiver 'til Thursday~, pleas Andy Capp."; -191: return "It's a tape of '70s rock. All original hits! All original artists!"; -192: return "You've found the fabled America Online disk graveyard!"; -193: return "Empty jewelboxes litter the landscape."; -194: return "It's the astounding meta-object."; -195: return "Ed McMahon stands here, lost in thought. Seeing you, he bellows, ~YES SIR!~"; -196: return "...thingy???"; -197: return "It's 1000 secrets the government doesn't want you to know!"; -198: return "The letters O and R."; -199: return "A magical... magic thing."; -200: return "It's a moment of silence."; -201: return "It's Sirhan-Sirhan, looking guilty."; -202: return "It's ~Chicken Soup for the Kitten-seeking Soulless Robot.~"; -203: return "It is a set of wind-up chatter teeth."; -204: return "It is a cloud shaped like an ox."; -205: return "You see a snowflake here, melting slowly."; -206: return "It's a big block of ice. Something seems to be frozen inside it."; -207: return "Vladimir Lenin's casket rests here."; -208: return "It's a copy of ~Zen and The Art of Robot Maintenance~."; -209: return "This invisible box contains a pantomime horse."; -210: return "A mason jar lies here open. Its label reads: ~do not open!~."; -211: return "A train of thought chugs through here."; -212: return "This jar of pickles expired in 1957."; -213: return "Someone's identity disk lies here."; -214: return "~Yes!~ says the bit."; -215: return "~No!~ says the bit."; -216: return "A dodecahedron bars your way."; -217: return "Mr. Hooper is here, surfing."; -218: return "It's a big smoking fish."; -219: return "You have new mail in /var/spool/robot"; -220: return "Just a monitor with the blue element burnt out."; -221: return "A pile of coaxial plumbing lies here."; -222: return "It's a rotten old shoe."; -223: return "It's a hundred-dollar bill."; -224: return "It's a Dvorak keyboard."; -225: return "It's a cardboard box full of 8-tracks."; -226: return "Just a broken hard drive containg the archives of Nerth Pork."; -227: return "A broken metronome sits here, its needle off to one side."; -228: return "A sign reads: ~Go home!~"; -229: return "A sign reads: ~No robots allowed!~"; -230: return "It's the handheld robotfindskitten game, by Tiger."; -231: return "This particular monstrosity appears to be ENIAC."; -232: return "This is a tasty-looking banana creme pie."; -233: return "A wireframe model of a hot dog rotates in space here."; -234: return "Just the empty husk of a locust."; -235: return "You disturb a murder of crows."; -236: return "It's a copy of the robotfindskitten EULA."; -237: return "It's Death."; -238: return "It's an autographed copy of ~Secondary Colors~, by Bob Ross."; -239: return "It is a marzipan dreadnought that appears to have melted and stuck."; -240: return "It's a DVD of ~Crouching Monkey, Hidden Kitten~, region encoded for the moon."; -241: return "It's Kieran Hervold. Damn dyslexia!"; -242: return "A non-descript box of crackers."; -243: return "Carbonated Water, High Fructose Corn Syrup, Color, Phosphoric Acid, Flavors, Caffeine."; -244: return "~Move along! Nothing to see here!~"; -245: return "It's the embalmed corpse of Vladimir Lenin."; -246: return "A coupon for one free steak-fish at your local family diner."; -247: return "A set of keys to a 2001 Rolls Royce. Worthless."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith -! -248: return "It's the Golden Banana of Discord!"; -249: return "The Inform Designer's Manual (4th edition)"; -250: return "A packet of pipe cleaners."; -251: return "It's Andrew Plotkin plotting something."; -252: return "A half-eaten cheese sandwich."; -253: return "Clang, clang, clang goes the tranny!"; -254: return "A family of integrals is here integrating."; -255: return "A tuft of kitten fur, but no kitten."; -256: return "A bottle of oil! Refreshing!"; -257: return "A shameless plug for Frotz: http://www.cs.csubak.edu/@@126dgriffi/proj/frotz/"; -258: return "Clifford Stoll is here selling Klein bottles."; -259: return "You found the marble in the oatmeal!"; -260: return "An empty Altoids tin."; -261: return "An empty Penguin Mints tin."; -262: return "So, THAT's what an invisible barrier looks like!"; -263: return "A cluster of cattails are growing here."; -264: return "A discarded bagpipe chanter reed."; -265: return "Big Bird is here looking for Mr. Looper."; -266: return "It's a Linux install CD."; -267: return "You found Puppy! Too bad this isn't ~robotfindspuppy~."; -268: return "Several meters of cat5 cable."; -269: return "A scrap of parchment bears the single word, ~meow~."; -270: return "A puddle of chocolate sauce."; -271: return "Your pal Floyd is here and wants to play Hucka-Bucka-Beanstalk."; -272: return "Someone is talking to Ralph on the big white phone here."; -273: return "'Twas brillig in the slivey-toves..."; -274: return "Darth Vader is here looking for his Teddywookie."; -275: return "A baboon with a bassoon hoots angrily at you."; -276: return "Catsup and Mustard all over the place! It's the Human Hamburger!"; -277: return "Gibble, Gobble, we ACCEPT YOU ..."; -278: return "A rancid corn dog."; -279: return "It's a tribute to fishnet stockings."; -280: return "A jar of Vegemite is playing hopscotch here."; -281: return "Nipples, dimples, knuckles, NICKLES, wrinkles, pimples!!"; -282: return "A bottle of hair tonic."; -283: return "A packet of catnip."; -284: return "Here's Cal Worthington and his dog ~Spot~!"; -285: return "It's Uncle Doctor Hurkamur!"; -286: return "YEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAA!!!!!"; -287: return "Thunder, Thunder, Thunder, Thunder Cats!!!"; -288: return "An overturned bottle of ink and lots of kitten pawprints."; -289: return "A flyer advertising a sale at Spatula City."; -290: return "A 540Hz tuning fork."; -291: return "A 3-inch floppy disk."; -292: return "Seargent Duffy is here."; -293: return "A ball of pocket fluff."; -294: return "A 3-sided Monty Python record."; -295: return "A Sanrio catalog."; -296: return "A scratching-post."; -297: return "Butane!!!"; -298: return "An ice cube."; -299: return "Just a cage of white mice."; -300: return "You've found Harvey, the Wonder Hamster!"; -301: return "A jar of dehydrated water."; -302: return "Just some swamp gas."; -303: return "A bowl of cherries."; -304: return "Spoon!!!"; -305: return "A sign reads ~Don't step on the Mome Raths~."; -306: return "Dirty socks."; -307: return "~Dogbert's tech support, how may I abuse you?~"; -308: return "A radio hisses away. Kitten must have been here."; -309: return "~Kilroy was here~"; -310: return "~Plexar was here~"; -311: return "~Kibo was here~"; -312: return "It's the cork to someone's lunch."; -313: return "A piping-hot pizza. Useless."; -314: return "Diogenes is here demanding whisky."; -315: return "The Monolith of Spam towers above you."; -316: return "~Meow meow meow meow...~ How discouraging! It's only a recording."; -317: return "Marvin is complaining about the pain in the diodes down his left side."; -318: return "Mr. Kamikaze and Mr. DNA are here drinking tea."; -319: return "Rene Descarte is whistling a happy tune here."; -320: return "Ooh, shiny!"; -321: return "It's a giant slorr!"; -322: return "A ketchup bottle (nearly empty)."; -323: return "A large pile of rubber bands."; -324: return "A ton of feathers."; -325: return "This nonkitten may contain peanuts."; -326: return "A tree with some jelly nailed to it."; -327: return "Ah, the skirl of the pipes and the rustle of the silicon..."; -328: return "You found Parakeet! Too bad this isn't ~robotfindsparakeet~."; -329: return "A ball of yarn."; -330: return "A big chunk of frozen chocolate pudding."; -331: return "There is no tea here."; -332: return "An automated robot-doubter. It doesn't believe in you."; -333: return "A plastic model of Kitten."; -334: return "It's Yorgle, the Yellow Dragon."; -335: return "It's Grundle, the Green Dragon."; -336: return "It's Rhindle, the Red Dragon."; -337: return "An old pattern is here going on and on."; -338: return "TV says donuts are high in fat."; -339: return "It's a pool with a straw in it."; -340: return "A singing frog. Useless."; -341: return "It's a funky beat!"; -342: return "A tiny ceramic Kitten. It's probably not the Kitten you're looking for."; -343: return "An oven mitt with kittens on it."; -344: return "An empty coaxial cable spool."; -345: return "Billions and billions of things that aren't Kitten."; -346: return "Snarf?"; -347: return "Faboo!"; -348: return "99 bottles of beer are on a wall here."; -349: return "Hydraulic fluid and jagged metal bits. You recoil from the scene of carnage."; -350: return "A bobolink is twittering a happy tune here."; -351: return "Biscuits."; -352: return "A blank deposit slip."; -353: return "What's that blue thing doing here?"; -354: return "A travel-sized cyclotron."; -355: return "A largish bath towel."; -356: return "You found Chinchilla! Too bad this isn't ~robotfindschinchilla~."; -357: return "A meerkat... not even close."; -358: return "A green yo-yo."; -359: return "A hairless rat."; -360: return "Bright copper kettles."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith for -! Release 3 -! -361: return "Ten yards of avocado-green shag carpet."; -362: return "A zorkmid coin."; -363: return "It's Babe Flathead's favorite bat."; -364: return "It's cute like a kitten, but isn't a kitten."; -365: return "A cyclops glowers angrily at you."; -366: return "A discarded pop bottle."; -367: return "Definitely not Kitten."; -368: return "A mouse."; -369: return "Slack!"; -370: return "A troll. Ewww!!!"; -371: return "A tube of white lithium grease. Perfect for your robotic joints."; -372: return "Talcum powder."; -373: return "A breadbox. Nope, Kitten isn't in the breadbox."; -374: return "An unlicensed nuclear accelerator."; -375: return "A sub-atomic particle languishes here all alone."; -376: return "A bowling ball with the name ~Bob~ inscribed on it."; -377: return "A briefcase filled with spy stuff."; -378: return "Is that an elephant's head or a winged sandal?"; -379: return "Bibbidy bibbidy bibbidy bibbidy bibbidy bibbidy..."; -380: return "A tube of toothpaste. Too bad you have no teeth."; -381: return "This isn't the item you're looking for."; -382: return "A discarded refrigerator box. Nope, Kitten isn't in the box."; -383: return "A paper shopping bag. Nope, Kitten isn't in the bag."; -384: return "A flyer reads, ~Please donate hydraulic fluid~"; -385: return "A dangly thing mangled by Kitten."; -386: return "A crouton."; -387: return "A patch from the Mammoth Caves."; -388: return "A leather pouch filled with multisided dice."; -389: return "A pair of combat boots."; -390: return "A pile of coconuts."; -391: return "A big bass drum bearing a hole and suspicious clawmarks."; -392: return "It's a clue!"; -393: return "Long lost needle nose pliers."; -394: return "A vase of roses."; -395: return "A crystal ball. It doesn't seem to know where Kitten is."; -396: return "It's Princess Leia, the yodel of life."; -397: return "Sigmund Freud is here asking about your mother."; -398: return "BURRRRP!!!! Flavorful and full of protein!"; -399: return "A jar of library paste."; -400: return "These aren't ordinary beans. They're magic beans!"; -401: return "Some sort of electronic handheld game from the 1970s."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith for -! Release 4 -! -402: return "Just some glop of some sort."; -403: return "A bottle of distilled water."; -404: return "A rusty slinky. It was such a wonderful toy!"; -405: return "Some coconut crabs are milling about here."; -406: return "Dancing cold water pipes. Mikey must have been here."; -407: return "Ash is mumbling ~KLAATU BARATA NI~ here."; -408: return "It's a blob of white goo."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith from the -! official list of NKIs. -! -409: return "A gravestone stands here. ~Izchak Miller, ascended.~"; -410: return "Someone has written ~ad aerarium~ on the ground here."; -410: return "A large blue eye floats in midair."; -411: return "This appears to be a statue of Perseus."; -412: return "There is an opulent throne here."; -413: return "It's a squad of Keystone Kops."; -414: return "This seems to be junk mail addressed to the finder of the Eye of Larn."; -415: return "A wondrous and intricate golden amulet. Too bad you have no neck."; -416: return "The swampy ground around you seems to stink with disease."; -417: return "An animate blob of acid. Being metallic, you keep well away."; -418: return "It's a copy of Knuth with the chapter on kitten-search algorithms torn out."; -419: return "A crowd of people, and at the center, a popular misconception."; -420: return "It's a blind man. When you touch, he exclaims ~It's a kitten prospecting robot!~"; -421: return "It's a lost wallet. It's owner didn't have pets, so you discard it."; -422: return "This place is called Antarctica. There is no kitten here."; -423: return "It's a mousetrap, baited with soap."; -424: return "A book with ~Don't Panic~ in large friendly letters across the cover."; -425: return "A compendium of haiku about metals."; -426: return "A discredited cosmology, relic of a bygone era."; -427: return "A hollow voice says ~Plugh~."; -428: return "A knight who says ~Either I am an insane knave, or you will find kitten.~"; -429: return "A neural net -- maybe it's trying to recognize kitten."; -430: return "A screwdriver."; -431: return "A statue of a girl holding a goose like the one in Gottingen, Germany."; -432: return "A tetradrachm dated ~42 B.C.~"; -433: return "A voice booms out ~Onward, kitten soldiers...~"; -434: return "An eminently forgettable zahir."; -435: return "Apparently, it's Edmund Burke."; -436: return "For a moment, you feel something in your hands, but it disappears!"; -437: return "Here is a book about Robert Kennedy."; -438: return "Hey, robot, leave those lists alone."; -439: return "Ho hum. Another synthetic a posteriori."; -440: return "It's Asimov's Laws of Robotics. You feel a strange affinity for them."; -441: return "It's Bach's Mass in B-minor!"; -442: return "It's a bug."; -443: return "It's a synthetic a priori truth! Immanuel would be so pleased!"; -444: return "It's the Tiki Room."; -445: return "Just some old play by a Czech playwright, and you can't read Czech."; -446: return "Kitten is the letter 'Q'. Oh, wait, maybe not."; -447: return "Quidquid Latine dictum sit, kitten non est."; -448: return "Sutro Tower is visible at some distance through the fog."; -449: return "The Digital Millennium Copyright Act of 1998."; -450: return "The United States Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit."; -451: return "The non-kitten item like this but with ~false~ and ~true~ switched is true."; -452: return "This is the chapter called ~A Map of the Cat?~ from Feynman's autobiography."; -453: return "This is the forest primeval."; -454: return "Werner's ~Pocket Field Guide to Things That Are Not Kitten~."; -455: return "You found nettik, but that's backwards."; -456: return "You have found some zinc, but you must not stop here, for you must find kitten."; -457: return "~50 Years Among the Non-Kitten Items~, by Ann Droyd."; -458: return "~Robot may not injure kitten, or, through inaction, ...~"; -459: return "~Address Allocation for Private Internets~ by Yakov Rekhter et al."; -460: return "~Mail Routing and the Domain System~ by Craig Partridge."; -461: return "~The Theory and Practice of Oligarchical Collectivism~ by Emmanuel Goldstein."; -462: return "~201 Kitten Verbs, Fully Conjugated~. You look for ~find~."; -463: return "A card shark sits here, practicing his Faro shuffle. He ignores you."; -463: return "A copy of DeCSS. They're a dime a dozen these days."; -464: return "A demonic voice proclaims ~There is no kitten, only Zuul~. You flee."; -465: return "A lotus. You make an interesting pair."; -466: return "A milk carton, with a black and white picture of kitten on the side."; -467: return "Any ordinary robot could see from a mile away that this wasn't kitten."; -468: return "A stegosaurus, escaped from the stegosaurusfindsrobot game. It finds you."; -469: return "Baling wire and chewing gum."; -470: return "Chewing gum and baling wire."; -471: return "Here is no kitten but only rock, rock and no kitten and the sandy road."; -472: return "Hey, I bet you thought this was kitten."; -473: return "It is an ancient mariner, and he stoppeth one of three."; -474: return "It pleases you to be kind to what appears to be kitten -- but it's not!"; -475: return "It's a blatant plug for Ogg Vorbis, http://www.vorbis.com/"; -476: return "It's a business plan for a new startup, kitten.net."; -477: return "It's a revised business plan for a new startup, my.kitten.net."; -478: return "It's a square."; -479: return "It seems to be a copy of ~A Tail of Two Kitties~."; -480: return "It's the Donation of Constantine!"; -481: return "It's this message, nothing more."; -482: return "Lysine, an essential amino acid. Well, maybe not for robots."; -483: return "No kitten here."; -484: return "The score for a Czech composer's ~Kitten-Finding Symphony in C~."; -485: return "This looks like Bradley's ~Appearance and Reality~, but it's really not."; -486: return "This non-kitten item no verb."; -487: return "You feel strangely unfulfilled."; -488: return "You hit the non-kitten item. The non-kitten item fails to yowl."; -489: return "You suddenly yearn for your distant homeland."; -490: return "You've found the snows of yesteryear! So that's where they all went to."; -491: return "Approaching. One car. J. Followed by. Two car. M, M. In five. Minutes."; -491: return "Free Jon Johansen!"; -492: return "Free Dmitry Sklyarov!"; -493: return "One person shouts ~What do we want?~ The crowd answers ~Free Dmitry!~"; -494: return "Judith Platt insults librarians."; -495: return "This map is not the territory."; -496: return "~Go back to Libraria!~, says Pat Schroeder."; -497: return "This is a porcelain kitten-counter. 0, 0, 0, 0, 0..."; -498: return "An old bootable business card, unfortunately cracked down the middle."; -499: return "A kitten sink, for washing kitten (if only kitten liked water)."; -500: return "A kitten source (to match the kitten sink)."; -501: return "If it's one thing, it's not another."; -502: return "If it's not one thing, it's another."; -503: return "A caboodle."; -504: return "A grin."; -505: return "A hedgehog. It looks like it knows something important."; -506: return "You've found... Oh wait, that's just a cat."; -507: return "Robot should not be touching that."; -508: return "Air Guitar!!! NA na NA na!!"; -509: return "An aromatherapy candle burns with healing light."; -510: return "You find a bright shiny penny."; -511: return "It's a free Jon Johansen!"; -512: return "It's a free Dmitry Sklyarov!"; -513: return "The rothe hits! The rothe hits!"; -514: return "It's an Internet chain letter about sodium laureth sulfate."; -515: return "Ed Witten sits here, pondering string theory."; -516: return "Something is written here in the dust. You read: ~rJbotfndQkttten~."; -517: return "We wish you a merry kitten, and a happy New Year!"; -518: return "Run away! Run away!"; -519: return "You can see right through this copy of Brin's ~Transparent Society~."; -520: return "This copy of ~Steal This Book~ has been stolen from a bookstore."; -521: return "It's Roya Naini."; -522: return "This kit is the fourteenth in a series of kits named with Roman letters."; -523: return "This is the tenth key you've found so far."; -524: return "You find a fraud scheme in which loans are used as security for other loans."; -525: return "It's the phrase ~and her~, written in ancient Greek."; -526: return "It's the author of ~Randomness and Mathematical Proof~."; -527: return "It's the crusty exoskeleton of an arthropod!"; -528: return "It's Emporer Shaddam the 4th's planet!"; -529: return "It's the triangle leg adjacent to an angle divided by the leg opposite it."; -530: return "It's a bottle of nail polish remover."; -531: return "You found netkit! Way to go, robot!"; -532: return "It's the ASCII Floating Head of Seth David Schoen!"; -533: return "A frosted pink party-cake, half eaten."; -534: return "A bitchin' homemade tesla coil."; -535: return "Conan O'Brian, sans jawbone."; -536: return "It's either a mirror, or another soulless kitten-seeking robot."; -537: return "Preoccupation with finding kitten prevents you from investigating further."; -538: return "Fonzie sits here, mumbling incoherently about a shark and a pair of waterskis."; -539: return "The ghost of your dance instructor, his face a paper-white mask of evil."; -540: return "A bag of groceries taken off the shelf before the expiration date."; -541: return "A book: Feng Shui, Zen: the art of randomly arranging items that are not kitten."; -542: return "This might be the fountain of youth, but you'll never know."; -543: return "Tigerbot Hesh."; -544: return "Stimutacs."; -545: return "A canister of pressurized whipped cream, sans whipped cream."; -546: return "The non-kitten item bites!"; -547: return "A chain hanging from two posts reminds you of the Gateway Arch."; -548: return "A mathematician calculates the halting probability of a Turing machine."; -549: return "A number of short theatrical productions are indexed 1, 2, 3, ... n."; -550: return "A technical university in Australia."; -551: return "It is -- I just feel something wonderful is about to happen."; -552: return "It's a Cat 5 cable."; -553: return "It's a U.S. president."; -554: return "It's a piece of cloth used to cover a stage in between performances."; -555: return "The ionosphere seems charged with meaning."; -556: return "This tomography is like, hella axial, man!"; -557: return "It's your favorite game -- robotfindscatan!"; -558: return "Just a man selling an albatross."; -559: return "The intermission from a 1930s silent movie."; -560: return "It's an inverted billiard ball!"; -561: return "The spectre of Sherlock Holmes wills you onwards."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith for -! Release 5 -! -562: return "It's a cookie shaped like a kitten."; -563: return "It's Professor Feedlebom."; -564: return "A bottle of smelling salts."; -565: return "Dinsdale!"; -566: return "An Enfield Mk3 rifle."; -567: return "An M16 rifle."; -568: return "An M1911A1 pistol."; -569: return "An M9 pistol."; -570: return "It's a gun of some sort."; -571: return "An FN-FAL rifle."; -572: return "An old rusty revolver."; -573: return "An AK-47 rifle."; -574: return "An AK-97 rifle."; -575: return "A Remington 870 shotgun."; -576: return "It's a NetBSD install CD."; -577: return "It's a recursive recursive recursive recursive recursive..."; -578: return "It's Brian Kernigan."; -579: return "It's Dennis Ritchie."; -580: return "It's nothing in particular."; -581: return "Just a box of backscratchers."; -582: return "An expired transistor."; -583: return "Air."; -584: return "A steam-powered bunnytron."; -585: return "Heeeeeeeeeeeeres Johnny!"; -586: return "It's a catalog from some company called Infocom."; -587: return "A dark-emitting diode."; -588: return "A 256 kilobyte write-only memory chip."; -589: return "A box of brand-new nixie tubes."; -590: return "Alien underwear."; -591: return "A sack of hammers."; -592: return "A sack of wet mice."; -593: return "A sack of doorknobs."; -594: return "A rusty melon-baller."; -595: return "An atomic vector plotter."; -596: return "You really don't want to know what this is."; -597: return "A 100 meter long chain of jumbo paper clips."; -598: return "A cockatoo shrieks at you."; -599: return "It's Mary Poppins!"; -600: return "A slightly-used smellovision set."; -601: return "Doodles Weaver is here looking over a horse race schedule."; -602: return "An overflowing bit bucket."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith for -! Release 6 -! -603: return "Blarg!"; -604: return "It's a hairy-armed hitchhiker!"; -605: return "A wolf wearing a nightgown is in bed here."; -606: return "A gecko zooms about on a skateboard here."; -607: return "A hovercraft full of eels is parked here."; -608: return "A waffle iron is here and it's still hot."; -609: return "A huge pile of pancakes."; -610: return "A threadbare tweed suit."; -611: return "A rusted safety pin."; -612: return "A model of a twin-hulled sailboat."; -613: return "A jar of lemon curd."; -614: return "~We interrupt this Zen Simulation...~"; -615: return "A sealed tin bearing only the word ~yummy~."; -616: return "It's a groat coated with pocket fluff."; -617: return "You find an Atari 2600 game cartridge with no label."; -618: return "A child's drawing of a kitten."; -619: return "It's a small bouncy creature, but obviously not kitten."; -620: return "It's an unknown area code."; -621: return "A bottle of ammonia."; -622: return "Tweeting birds."; -623: return "It's a rapidly oscillating function."; -624: return "A dogcow moofs at you."; -625: return "A puddle of purple semi-gloss latex paint."; -626: return "It's a merry-go-round (broken down)."; -627: return "The pants that Curly died in."; -628: return "A vanilla pudding pop."; -629: return "It's Jesse James' severed hand and it's still moving."; -630: return "It's more money than you'll ever need."; -631: return "A tiny robot scuttles across the floor."; -632: return "Chunk is here doing the truffle-shuffle."; -633: return "Data is here setting up some booty traps."; -634: return "A waterlogged grand piano."; -635: return "One liter of fuming nitric acid."; -636: return "A gold-dipped rose."; -637: return "Bronzed baby shoes."; -638: return "An electric engraving pencil."; -639: return "A small, featureless, white cube."; -640: return "It's a battery-powered brass lantern."; -641: return "It's an elongated brown sack, smelling of hot peppers."; -642: return "A glass bottle containing a quantity of water."; -643: return "It's a blob of red goo."; -644: return "It's a blob of blue goo."; -645: return "It's a blob of yellow goo."; -646: return "It's a blob of green goo."; -647: return "It's a blob of orange goo."; -648: return "It's a blob of purple goo."; -649: return "It's a blob of black goo."; -650: return "It's a blob of brown goo."; -651: return "A Scooby Snack! Yay!"; -652: return "A squirrel contentedly gnaws on a sprinkler head here."; -653: return "Snacky things."; -654: return "A toupee."; -655: return "Seat cushion fluff."; -656: return "Jacket fluff."; -657: return "Haven't you touched this thing before?"; -658: return "It's a copy of the Book of Found Kittens."; -659: return "It's a nasty knife."; -660: return "It's a grue. Fortunately, they don't like to eat robots."; -661: return "It's a phone book for the 661 area code."; -662: return "A tiny velvet pouch."; -663: return "Brass tacks."; -664: return "It's a rotating potato."; -665: return "Leave that thing alone!"; -666: return "It's the mark of the beast!"; -667: return "A tube of heat sink grease."; -668: return "A dead battery."; -669: return "A pile of irrigation valves."; -670: return "A stony meteorite."; -671: return "An iron meteorite."; -672: return "It's a fragment of an old Russian spacecraft."; -673: return "A large block of dry ice."; -674: return "It's a Commodore 64 computer (in mint condition)."; -675: return "It's an Apple II+ computer (in mint condition)."; -676: return "It's a Kaypro II portable computer."; -677: return "It's a Texas Instruments TI-89 graphing calculator."; -678: return "It's an Atari 800 computer."; -679: return "It's an Amiga 2000 computer."; -680: return "An oddly familiar face shouts ~SCREWTEK!~ from this computer monitor."; -681: return "It's an Osborne portable computer."; -682: return "It's a nameless MSX computer from Japan."; -683: return "A vacuum cleaner appears to have exploded here."; -684: return "It's a model of a catamaran."; -685: return "A cardboard box of sheet metal screws."; -686: return "A brown glass vial labeled ~tincture of iodine~."; -687: return "Just some sort of cat toy."; -688: return "It's a large pile of crumpled notepaper."; -689: return "You've found the decoy kitten!"; -690: return "It's a pile of wine corks."; -691: return "A neat pile of plastic irrigation pipe."; -692: return "It's one of those carpet-covered things for cats to climb."; -693: return "This thing appears to be an ancient Roman breastplate."; -694: return "A claymore."; -695: return "An unripe orange."; -696: return "A toy zeppelin."; -697: return "It's a bucket of mud."; -698: return "It's a bucket of water."; -699: return "A clay pot with grass growing it in sits here."; -700: return "A discarded envelope chewed by Kitten."; -701: return "A hollow voice says ~Fool!~"; -702: return "Several hackles are here and they appear to be up."; -703: return "Just some spite."; -704: return "Vitriol."; -705: return "There is a small mailbox here."; -706: return "A large oriental rug."; -707: return "It's an elvish sword of great antiquity."; -708: return "A large coil of rope is here."; -709: return "You've found a speed bump."; -710: return "It's a whirly thing of some sort."; -711: return "An empty Slurpee cup."; -712: return "This is a disaster area."; -713: return "A small box of fishing weights."; -714: return "A street map of the city of Anaheim."; -715: return "Bits of red construction paper are scattered all about."; -716: return "You won't believe what this is."; -717: return "A meat-scented air-freshener on a string dances in the breeze."; -718: return "A intact clay pigeon."; -719: return "Pieces of broken clay pigeons are scattered all about."; -720: return "This looks like a skateboarding arcade video game."; -721: return "It's a steaming bowl of homemade gnocci."; -722: return "An electric fan lies on its side here."; -723: return "It's something fizzy."; -724: return "A hickory stump."; -725: return "This tiny barbecue is spotlessly clean."; -726: return "A saucer of milk, untouched by Kitten."; -727: return "Insane laughter issues from this vibrating shipping crate."; -728: return "Haven't you checked here already?"; -729: return "Just some rusted lug nuts and an ancient hub cap."; -730: return "A rusty crowbar."; -731: return "A post hole digger is stuck in a pile of dirt here."; -732: return "It's a spade."; -733: return "It's the Queen of Hearts! ~Off with their heads!~, she shouts."; -734: return "An assortment of highly-nutritious vegetables."; -735: return "A dead click beetle."; -736: return "A roll of scratch-and-sniff stickers."; -737: return "A roll of duct tape."; -738: return "Someone dropped a cheap ballpoint pen here."; -739: return "Someone dropped an expensive fountain pen here."; -740: return "You've found the Gingerbread Man!"; -741: return "You've found the Stinky Cheese Man!"; -742: return "This looks like an umbrella turned inside out."; -743: return "3.14159... Pi is all over the place here..."; -744: return "You almost mistook this meatloaf for Kitten."; -745: return "This drawer is full of dried out rubber stoppers."; -746: return "A flask of hydrochloric acid is here."; -747: return "Why are you bothering that old man instead of finding Kitten?"; -748: return "It's a hyperkinetic rabbity thing."; -749: return "A dog dressed in a cheap suit is here."; -750: return "~Help me Robot! You're my only hope!~"; -751: return "You found Budgie! Too bad this isn't ~robotfindsbudgie~."; -752: return "It's a sleeping lion."; -753: return "It's an example of the infamous space-cadet keyboard."; -754: return "You find a random assortment of dots and dashes."; -755: return "Nothing but some scribbles in crayon."; -756: return "It's a week-old baloney sandwich."; -757: return "It's a red stapler."; -758: return "It's a red staple-remover."; -759: return "It's a ~Wicked Tinkers~ CD."; -760: return "You see a rhinestone-studded dog collar, but no dog."; -761: return "It's a box of lox."; -762: return "It's a box of pinball machine parts."; -763: return "You've discovered an enormous pile of socks."; -764: return "It's a photograph of Kitten."; - -! The following Non Kitten Items were added by David Griffith for -! Release 7 -! -765: return "It's a copy editor, reading aloud from the Associated Press Stylebook."; -765: return "It's a copy editor, reading aloud from the MLA Stylebook."; -766: return "Kitty kibble is scattered all about."; -767: return "A bartender growls, ~No robots allowed!~"; -768: return "It's a Franklin Ebookman."; -769: return "It's a child's kitten pull-toy."; -770: return "~I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast!~"; -771: return "~I drive real fast. I'm gonna last.~"; -772: return "~I'm a big pirate and I like to steal!~"; -773: return "~I like to steal and I like to kill!~"; -774: return "~I'm a Barbie doll but I've got brains!~"; -775: return "~I'm your doctor and here's the bill.~"; -776: return "Go! Go! Go, Speed Racer!"; -777: return "It's a Boeing 777 airliner."; -778: return "Someone is taking time out for fun here."; -779: return "You see a street lamp and a lamplighter here."; -780: return "A broken cricket bat."; -781: return "It's a mint-condition IMSAI 8080 computer!"; -782: return "A hollow voice says ~xyzzy~."; -783: return "Wimpy is here asking for a hamburger."; -784: return "You found Olive Oyl!"; -785: return "It's Popeye!"; -786: return "Bluto is here looking for Olive Oyl."; -787: return "~Et tu, Brutus?~"; -788: return "The bodily remains of a Roman emperor."; -789: return "Yay! It's a hoola hoop!"; -790: return "The Smart Patrol is here."; -791: return "It's an old sandal."; -792: return "It's a feather duster."; -793: return "It's a zipper."; -794: return "It's an old crumhorn with a broken reed."; -795: return "A sticky old cough drop."; -796: return "A jar of buttons."; -797: return "A bearded dragon lizard is sitting here."; -798: return "A garden toad."; -799: return "A garden gnome."; -800: return "A garden weasel."; - -default: return "Unknown NKI (this should not happen)"; +[ print_all_nki num mystring; + @output_stream 2; @output_stream -1; + for (num = 1: num <= MESSAGE_NUM: num++) { + mystring = lookup_msg(num); + print (string)lookup_msg(num), "^"; } + @output_stream -2; @output_stream 1; ];