From: Craig Maloney Date: Wed, 3 Apr 2019 12:57:55 +0000 (-0400) Subject: Adding more about getting help X-Git-Tag: 20200112^2~75 X-Git-Url: https://jxself.org/git/?a=commitdiff_plain;h=efd37ccd11fd2ebcb07a456337b72147ef68ae28;p=themediocreprogrammer.git Adding more about getting help --- diff --git a/chapter07.md b/chapter07.md index 434f3e2..bc4d426 100644 --- a/chapter07.md +++ b/chapter07.md @@ -122,9 +122,11 @@ The most common reason for our reluctance in asking for help is our desire for c "There's no shame in asking for help" is an overused phrase, but asking for help is not a shameful act. We need the help of others. Even someone saying "I'm sorry you're dealing with that" can be a connection with someone else who sympathizes what we're going through. Finding others who are willing to listen, empathize, and commiserate can be the difference between feeling part of a community and feeling like we've been abandoned in our profession. -### FIXME +We also need to recognize when our support systems aren't supporting us. If we find that talking with someone else is not helping us resolve the issue we may need to find other means of help. You may recognize that you need additional support. Realizing that you need additional support can be a difficult realization, but once you have that realization I'd encourage you to act and get additional help. This requires self-awareness and honesty with how you are feeling. Only you know your situation and if you're being honest with yourself. And if you're not being honest with yourself then only you can take the initiative to seek out the help that you need. Nobody else knows your inner-workings better than you. + +Asking for and receiving help takes time and practice. When we're younger we have very simple means of asking for help (crying, pointing, etc.). But as we grow our world becomes more complex. Our ways of asking for help mature as we mature. But like any learned behavior we need repetition and practice to become better at asking for and receiving help. -We also need to recognize when our support systems aren't supporting us any longer. If we find that simply taking about a problem isn't giving us resolution we may need to find other means of help. You may recognize that you need some additional support, but it's far more common for folks to believe that they can do it all on their own. Only you know your situation and only you know if you're being honest with yourself and if you're deluding yourself. And if you're deluding yourself then only you can take the initiative to seek out the help that you need. Nobody else knows your inner-workings better than you. +### FIXME ## Giving up